So you just landed a meeting with that leader you admire and have always wanted to mentor you, or a client you have been chasing for months. You’re excited and walking on cloud nine.
I can relate.
I vividly remember a time when a leader I admire agreed to meet with me. I could barely contain my excitement and immediately called my mentor to share the news and everything I planned to do at the meeting with this leader. After listening to me for about a minute, my mentor asked me, “What questions are you going to ask him?” I had no idea. I had been so focused on what I was going to say and do; asking questions never crossed my mind. Just before he said goodbye and hung up, my mentor said to me, “Show up ready to ask questions.”
Questions are essential to learning and success. Some of the best leaders I know describe asking questions as an essential step toward identifying ways to navigate through business and personal challenges. They cite asking questions as a highly effective process that enables them find the direction, solutions and results they want.
Business guru and life coach, Tony Robbins, says that “Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers.”
Asking the right questions helps you gather better information, increases understanding, and leads to breakthroughs… this takes some level of intentionality. Ever since that call with my mentor, I have followed the steps below to increase my chances of asking the right questions so I can find the directions, and take the actions that lead to the results I want.
1. Plan
Generally questions pop up during conversations and much of it cannot be scripted ahead of time, however, planning some specific questions prior to meeting with a mentor, client or anyone you want to learn from can significantly increase your ability to make the best of the opportunity.
Before the meeting, take some time to think about some things you would like to learn. This will give you something to look forward to and increase the chances of you learning something you may otherwise have not.
2. Write it down
Have you ever left a meeting or hung up the phone after a call and realized you forgot to ask a particular question? I have multiple times. Once I forgot about a question I intended to ask a Vice President of a major bank until later in the day when my wife asked me how the meeting went. I kicked myself for days on this one because my wife pulled some strings to help me land that meeting, and I never got a second chance. Things happen – you get distracted, forget, or run out of time. This taught me a lesson: a short pencil is always better than a long memory. You can be prepared and avoid letting this happen to you by writing your question(s) down.
3. Review
This is an essential step in this 3 part process. It gives you the opportunity to think through and crystallize the answer(s) to the question(s) you asked, review and take any required or suggested actions, and to explore new or follow-up questions.
We learn the most when we ask questions, and as evolving leaders it is our responsibility to cultivate the habit of asking questions so we are able to bridge the gap between what we do and don’t know, and beyond.